in the thick of it

So, I am without Internet most of the time this summer, as evidenced by the fact my last post was a month ago.  That's one reason I haven't written.  The other reason is that I'm getting married in September.  Which is, well, soon.

me & my husband-to-be

See, I've had friends get married & have heard them exclaim through their murky fog of stress, anxiety, and advance planning, "it's so much work!"  and have thought to myself, "bah.  can't be that much work."  But now that I'm in the thick of the aforementioned fog, ah, there's the rub.  It's even more work than my friends let on.  Preparing for a wedding is a crazy thing.  You're throwing a one-shot party for the most important folks in your life and you know in advance that you'll remember it forever.  I'm suddenly spending hours deciding on a certain precise shade of blue, cutting out fabric leaf shapes for handmade boutonnières, designing a wedding logo, trying out different updos, choosing cake toppers, and the list goes on.  Luckily I love to make things and do graphic design and paw through decor magazines and daydream about personalized touches to traditional events.  A lot of it is trying to strike a fine balance between DIY-until-you-fall-down-dead and spending-yourself-into-a-black-hole-of-debt.  Either you have time or you have money, right?

me at the PEI Pottery Studio making tiles for our wedding favours

a sneak peek at our wedding favour tiles!

Anyway, it's no big news that summer is a busy time on PEI, no matter what your jam is.  Somehow we carve out an afternoon here & there to go to the beach, sit on the deck with friends, lay in the hammock, work in the garden.  And thank goodness for that, because when my stress levels get high, all I want to do is putter about in my garden & make cocktails using my freshly grown herbs.  Luxurious relaxation techniques that will no doubt come in handy as we get closer and closer....

art is an honesty contest

The title of this post is taken from an amazing interview I recently read with Ran Ortner (this guy is an incredible artist, well worth checking out) in The Sun where, when asked how what weight he places on commercial/art institution success/approval, he says:

"Art is not a skill contest, nor an innovation contest.  Art is an honesty contest.  If we can be precisely who we are, in the most intimate and candid and courageous way, we will start to connect to the universal...In the compression of the intensely personal, heat is generated, and at a certain point it becomes expansive.  The work goes from the intimately personal to what's personal to all of us." 

summer basket - mrl 2012

Well, that's what I've been thinking about lately.  I'm Artist-in-Residence for the summer this year  at the gallery/shop of a good friend, Hutchinson Pottery & Gallery in North Milton, PEI.  It's in a beautiful old schoolhouse, about a 15 min. drive from my house, in a gorgeous, peaceful area, and it has no internet - but it does have a hammock! 

Hutchinson Pottery & Gallery - mrll 2012

It's made me realize how much time & mental energy I spend just exploring the internet & how little time I actually take to process any of it.  Since I started this week at the gallery I've enjoyed many a good Sit n' Think by the window or out front in the Adirondack chair.  It's wonderful.  I have time to read, reflect, and best of all, to make my art.  People drop by in no rush at all & chat with me & look at the wares. 

my studio for the summer - mrll 2012

I feel very personal about the work that I make, and sometimes, when thinking about the Big Bad Art World, making personal work seems trite or not in fashion, but for me it's where I connect with the flow of creativity, where I get my best ideas, where I relax and understand things.  It's honest for me.  I believe that the best thing the individual can do for the world is to become the best self that they can be, to dig deeply within, and 100% of the time, what is extracted from that core is universal to all of us. 

my winnipeg

tulips in Assiniboine Park - ml 2012

I'm just two days back from Winnipeg and PEI has already swept me up in the enchantment of summer such that it's hard to imagine being anywhere else.  However, while I was out there, I cheated a little bit on my island, and gave my heart to the Peg while I was in it. 

Winnipeg often gets a bad rap; people think it's cold, barren, inhospitable to human life.  It's totally untrue.  First of all, the weather is actually pretty great.  Winters are very cold, yes, but also dry, so it doesn't feel anywhere near as cold as, say, Montreal, and the other three seasons are spectacular.  It is full of elm trees, which may well be the most beautiful of all the trees.  Winnipeg has amazing restaurants, galleries, shops, nightlife, some of the most innovative architecture I've ever seen anywhere, and one of the most thriving and interesting cultural scenes in North America.  You can cycle all over the place on beautiful trails.  You can have a bonfire on the riverbank, right in the city.  Now that is civilized.

I've been there 5 times now, so I'm a bit of an expert :)
Here are some of my favorite spots:

The Exchange District - I'm nuts about this part of town.
Toad Hall Toys - you could easily spend a whole afternoon in there.
Ragpickers - one of the best vintage stores in the country.  A bit of a counter-culture institution.
Platform:  Centre for Photographic & Digital Arts - one of the most interesting artist-run centres in Canada.
Mondragon - a yummy vegan cafe & radical/anarchist bookstore

copperplate entryway at the Martha St. Studio - ml 2012

Martha Street Studio - home of the Manitoba Printmakers Association, also has a gallery & shop & really kind people.  Printmaking heaven.

Then you can shoot up to Osborne Village, get some sweet clothes/books/papers at Kustom Kulture, check out the weird old stuff (my fave!) in the gigantic Osborne Antiques Mart
and then have the most delicious Ethiopian food at Massawa - but be prepared for a bit of a wait for your food, they're notorious for taking a long time.  It's soooo worth it though ;)

playful cubs in the Leo Mol Sculpture Garden, Assiniboine Park - ml 2012

Of course, no visit to Winnipeg is complete without a beer at Cousin's Deli in Wolseley/West Broadway, an afternoon trip to the WAG and its neighbour, Plug In ICA, pastries from Tall Grass Bakery, either in Wolseley or at the Forks (while you're there you can gaze in awe at the new Canadian Museum for Human Rights ), groceries for a picnic in Vimy Ridge Park from Deluca's & Organic Planet, and a stroll through the stunning and enormous Assiniboine Park.

If you've had prejudices about this city and have never been, give it another chance.  The sunsets alone are worth the trip.  And don't even get me started on the trip I took up north through Riding Mountain!

one of the many lakes in Riding Mountain National Park - ml 2012

dangling your toes in the water

When you're a kid, your parents are always trying to teach you things.  Some of them you pick up of course, but others you completely ignore.  And then, when you're in your thirties, you'll wish that you had paid attention and learned those things. 

My Dad especially was/is always generous about sharing his skill and knowledge with me.  Over the years he has taught me how to drive, negotiate, shingle a house, make my own shoes, compose a photo, and appreciate the luxuries in life.  Still, there are things I wish I had learned from him when I had the chance.  For instance, he used to have a sailboat when I was little, and was always offering to teach me and my sister how to sail.  I was usually preoccupied with dangling my toes in the water off the bow and didn't want to learn how to do anything but just sit there and enjoy the sensations of water and wind and sun.  But now?  Boy, I wish I knew how to sail. 

north shore - mrll 2011

 Recently I've been watching all the nominated films for the Vimeo Awards, prompted by the fact that a very talented filmmaker friend, Millefiore Clarkes, is up for an award in the lyrical category.  You can watch her brilliant and beautiful film, December in Toronto, here. 

Watching all these incredible short films has brought to mind another thing I wish I had really learned from my Dad when I had the chance.  Up until I was around twenty-two, my Dad worked in the film industry.  He started out as a cinematographer, then worked his way into directing, and later producing.  When he began, he did everything himself, so he knew about lighting, art direction, editing, etc., which made him a great leader on set.  I started working with him when I was about twelve or thirteen, and worked on TV and feature film productions large and small right up until he got out of the business.  It was, by then, time for me to get out too.  The film industry in Montreal was a little too fast and furious for the twenty-year-old introvert that I was, and I retreated for years into yoga and free-wheeling travel instead. 

into toronto - mrll 2011

I mean, I learned a lot working on set all those years - I did a tiny bit of acting, worked in production office, and for several years as an assistant director -  but what I really wish, now that I'm interested in it, is that I had taken one of the many chances I had to get behind the camera.  There is so much that goes into making a film, you could easily spend your whole life learning about it.  I suppose, though, that it's never too late.  And inspiration goes a long way to making up for lost time...

what gets in

If you bring forth that which is within you, what you bring forth will save you.  If you do not bring forth that which is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.  ~ Gospel of Thomas

If you can't see God in All, you can't see God at all. - Yogi Bhajan

the one they cut down - mrll 2011

Recently I've had good reason to count my blessings.  A few weeks ago I taught a Yoga & Creativity workshop in Souris, PEI at the Fortune Bridge Yoga Studio.  And then shortly after that I went with some folks out to the Trailside Cafe, which is just about the coziest, friendliest place you could ever want to have dinner & listen to some tunes.  Mitch Schurman opened up with some heart-wrenching songs, and then Catherine Maclellan finished off the night with her usual grace and humour.  I live in one of the safest, most beautiful places in the entire world.  I'm making good headway with my studio practice.  I have an abundance of friends and family who love me and support me.  I am marrying my incredible partner who is also my best friend.  I do what I love as my job.  I love my life, I really do. 

The thing is, though, I have anxiety, fear, anger, sadness, pain, just like anyone.  Having your ideal circumstances doesn't exempt you from carrying the weight that we all carry as human beings.  So, as much as  I would rather insulate myself and not listen to the news and the horrible things we humans do to each other, it gets in.  Worry about what will happen next gets in.  A highway that might get built right through some beautiful, fragile land that I deeply love.  Sorrow for the pain and loss of others gets in.  Today, it's a story about a man beaten to death by another man outside a bar in Halifax.  I don't really know what to do about any of this except to do better in my own life.  Try to be more kind, more available, more understanding, more compassionate.  Try to forgive everyone.  Try to forgive myself.  Try to talk about it, so we all know we're not alone.  Try to bring forth that which is within me, and to say something about what I saw and felt and knew while I was here in this world.  Damn but if it doesn't get rough sometimes.

spatial awareness

installation-in-progress - mrll 2012

I spent last week in Fredericton, NB installing my show, The Sky is Always Moving, at the UNB Art Centre Gallery.  I was in the East Gallery, which has these dark charcoal walls that were perfect for showcasing the work - I used natural dyes for everything, so the colours are soft and muted. 

This was my first experience with installation work - the show includes photography, mixed media sculpture, and video projection.  For the video I collaborated with Julie Scriver, who did some wonderful choreography, my fiancé Devon Ross who (along with helping me install the show!) composed and performed the music as well as performing the choreography along with Celine Gorham.  An example of the materials I used for this show:  plaster, plywood, cotton, silk, felt, handmade paper, antique lace, and found pointe shoes.  :)

still image from the body cage (your body holds you back) - monica lacey 2012

The exhibit grew out of a personal introspection where I was thinking back on my long history with dance.  I grew up studying ballet, modern dance, and jazz, for many years, and then stopped taking classes in my early twenties, but would go out dancing regularly to live music.  But then for several years I just wasn't dancing at all, not even in my living room.  And I missed it.  And I wanted to know why I wasn't dancing.  So I started asking myself some questions about the nature of dance, and then opened it up & began talking to other dancers, both trained and recreational, and the responses were really interesting.  

all the reasons why (detail) - monica lacey 2012

Everyone had something to say about dance and about why you might engage in it or not.  I then distilled the answers I was given, combined with my own, and worked out three sections to the exhibit that offer a perspective on why one would resist the natural human urge to move to rhythm:  part 1. the body cage (your body holds you back); part 2. the heavy heart (your heart weighs you down); part 3. the haunted mind (your thoughts exhaust you).  I recently received a Creation Grant from the PEI Council of the Arts to continue and expand my work on this project, so I'll be adding to it and evolving it.  The exhibit at the UNB Art Centre runs until April 20th.

the haunted mind - monica lacey 2012

slowly but surely

camp kitchen, abandoned series - mrll 2010

I know, I know, the whole point of a blog is to be updating it regularly.  These days I'm lucky if I manage to get out to check my mail and get a coffee.  I have a solo exhibition coming up (in less than 2 weeks!!) at the UNB Art Centre in Fredericton, NB.  Therefore, I have not left my studio in quite some time. 

The pressure on an artist is immense.  Even if you somehow succeed in not caring what others think of you and your work, your own inner critic can be incredibly harsh, saying things like, "oh, look at the nice drawing you made.  Bet you'll never be able to do that again."  Or, "if this work isn't amazing, you'll probably never, ever get another show."  So, to soothe that unruly inner beast, I spend a lot of time just thinking about the work I'm creating.  Sitting in my studio and examining it, looking for anything I may have missed or overlooked is when I often get my best ideas, insights that can advance a project and fuel me with inspiration. 

As I've mentioned before, being a full-time artist consists of an insane amount of administrative work:  applying for exhibitions, grants, residencies, etc.  can easily take up half of my week.  However, now and then it really pays off:  I recently was awarded a Creation Grant I had applied for from the PEI Council of the Arts!  Basically this is amazing validation for my work, and also financial support to help me spend more time in my studio creating said work.  I'm thankful to the Council of course, but also thankful to the Me who slaved over the application last October, revising and rewording well into the wee hours.  Good things are happening.  Now, I have to get back to my studio!